HashTag ‘Not Drinking’

Stepping onto the road of spontaneous sobriety.

Photo by kazuend on Unsplash

The Truth

I should clarify, lest anyone think I am on a long road of recovery. I am 5 weeks in. But, other than pregnancy, this is probably the longest I’ve gone in the last decade without having at least a few beers or a cocktail. I was even able to personally justify having a few glasses of wine while following a Whole 30 (that crazy diet/cleanse that helps you feel amazing but makes it nearly impossible for you to share a meal with anyone not following it). For the record, in case any of you reading this are trying Whole 30 and just felt a spark of hope, there is no possible way to justify drinking wine on a Whole 30.

How It Began

After an event, I went out for a drink with a friend. A friend who, of her own admittance, does not usually go out for drinks. By the end of the night (a night in which I thought I would be home by 10 all tucked into my bed), I was driving around the dark back roads of a local town. In the back seat of my car sat a random married couple, (I knew the woman from a local open mic but had never hung out with her before my friend picked them up at the bar). They were trying to help me get my friend home. My friend, in what I assume was a blackout, angrily refused to tell me where she lived and kept trying to get out of the car every time I pulled over to make sense of what was happening. She wanted to go back to her car, sleep it off for a few hours and then drive herself home. It was 1 am.

What will the future hold?

As I said before, I will not put a date on this sobriety. I will not place a pile of expectations on a very wobbly table with questionable legs. I am building backwards, shoving rocks and sticks underneath to build a foundation. We have a trip to Mexico in a few months, and there’s not much I love more than a hammock in the sun, a good book and a beer. Plus summer, BBQs, river days, campfires, music festivals…my descent is on the horizon. But perhaps, if I can build strong enough legs before then, I might just slip off periodically and not totally crumble.

author, poet, storyteller, podcaster, mother, wife, traveler, questioner annefricke.com

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